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Discussion Starter #1
Ok so Ive got my gear sorted but Im having probs with confidence. Ive wanted to start running for ages but I just cant get over this hurdle. I read posts from other 'newbies' and its all 'oh Ive only managed 2 miles today' and heres me wishing I could lol

So I thought 'ok I'll book a place on a race for life' - something to aim for, which I did last night, it doesnt matter whether I walk, run or crawl across the finish line as long as I do it. Thought that would be a good place to start, and told myself Id go for a run this morning to get things started.

Woke up at 6am, and promptly told myself it was a waste of time, that Id look stupid etc. Angry with myself for not going but Im so self conscious its hard. I cant run during the day as I have my children to look after, I think evenings are a bit busier than Id like and to be honest with a 2 year old and an 8 week old by the time Ive got them to bed at 7pm Im pretty knackered myself! So personally I think early mornings suit me better, I just need to know how to stop my mind racing (at least that is lol) with negative thoughts, and stop caring about what others think.

I think Id feel daft of only managing a run around the block, puts me off a bit too in a weird kinda way - I know I have to start somewhere and that would be better than nothing wouldnt it. Im just too impatient for my own good and want to be running miles already!

I dont have anyone to run with either, Ive got details about a group near me but dont know if I want to call them. Id be so nervous about meeting up.

Get me outta my house!
 

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Sounds like your both confusing and scaring yourself Dillinger!!! Just relax, and try not to worry about it so much...

First things first is to get yourself out the door - weather it's to walk or run around the block or to get a newspaper or whatever... put some kit on and physically open the front door and stand outside. At that time in the morning there won't be many people around, and those that are (i'm sorry to say) probably won't even notice you as they're busy getting to work, or half asleep anyway! lol. If you've got a route you plan on trying to start with... OFF YOU GO! Walk it the first day if you feel silly running, and get yourself thinking it's silly that you're only going ruond the block - it doesn't matter how far you're going, and there's nobody monitoring you anyway :)

Contacting the group may either work for or against you... either it'll force you to get out there... or you'll worry even more. Personally I'd try and start alone or with someone else, rather than a group, just so you get to know what you're capable of.

I think I could write a fair old chunk on reasons why you shouldn't worry and feel silly, but ultimately you just need to push yourself a tiny little bit out your comfort zone for what may well be the reward of a lifetime - there's definately a little voice in that post screaming that it wants to get out there... so give it a chance and I'm sure you'll not regret it :d
 

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Hi Dillinger

Welcome to Runners Forum.:d

Firstly – congrats on entering the Race For Life – You’ll love it.;)

Secondly - Very few people are able to just start running for miles and miles (unless they have built up their fitness doing other sports). I started about 15 months ago. At first I could barley run a few hundred yards without feeling like I was going to die, but stick with – you’ll be amazed how quickly you can progress.

Why don’t you try going out for a walk in the morning and after a few minutes do a bit of a run, then when you feel out of breath, just slow down into a walk. There are loads of training programs on the internet to get you started.

Lastly – Confidence. I think we all feel a bit self conscious at first but I can guarantee that you will get nothing but support and respect from other runners. Phone up the running group nearby and have a chat. And if you do get the odd negative comment from the local village idiots – smile and keep running. As you start upping the mileage your confidence will grow and the sense of achievement you get by finishing races make you glow with pride…

As the advert says…JUST DO IT.

Good luck

Slowsteve
 

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Welcome D.

I`m probably not the best example of how to do things,but 3 years ago when I stopped smoking and started to run,getting around the block (about a mile) was all I wanted to do.

Your right about being too impatient.The worst thing you can do is try too much to soon.

Start with that run around the block and take it slowly from there.

Keep us informed of how things go. There are plenty of experienced runners on this forum,and people who have got a similar domestic set up as yours.

As for the self confidence thing.

You won`t look stupid.
Other runners will see you as one of them,however slow you think you are going.
Everybody else will wish it was them who had the gumption to get out there and do it.

All the best.

Dave.




.
 

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^^^^^^

Wot Slowsteve said

Thing to remember is when we say "only 2 miles" - we are talking a different reality

The average Joe Public wouldn't even dream of WALKING 2 miles just for the sake of it (let alone run) or they say "thats not far" - to which you reply "no it isn't IN A CAR"

Welcome to the other reality....
 

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Discussion Starter #6
Thanks for your messages, theyre very supportive and helpful!

I really will try harder to just get out there and do it.
 

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Just echoing what everyone else said. I remember last September when I started running. I bought myself some cool jogging pants and a top, and did feel a bit self conscious - then I thought, well, if I'm running I'll look like a runner, and if I walk I'll just look like one of the local chaps who wear such kit anyway hanging around street corners ;)

I can be a very self conscious person - so the first time I set off running, having no real aim other than to find a new focus and get a bit fitter, I felt quite odd. And I ran about 200 yards and had to stop because I thought my lungs were going to explode and my heart was going to burst. But the next time I did it and managed 250 yards - what a sense of achievement! And then I built it lampost by lampost, just going a bit further each time. On my old route there used to be an elderly chap walking his dog, who would tell me how proud he was of me every time I passed him - didn't know him from Adam, but I'll always remember that.

Anyway, now I am running 10k a few times a week, entering races - by no means a very fast or accomplished runner, but the sense of achievement, whether I run a little further or a little faster, is fantastic.

So just go for it, start small, and remember even doing 50 yards more than you did last time is an achievement which you can build and build on :d
 

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Discussion Starter #8
Thanks! Im a pretty self conscious person anyway but now Ive got my post-baby shape to be conscious of its a bit worse than usual! Theres always baggier tops I guess ;)

So it seems like once you get going you can improve pretty soon? Thats got to be a good incentive hasnt it!

If I just stop being daft and get on with it I could be well on my way :)
 

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Starting is the hardest thing - for each and every one of us runners. And not only when we first started but everytime we go for a run! I know a lot of people are like me and whenever we get the trainers on it's Oh do I have to go out? By the end of it we don't want to stop but want to keep going forever :p

One tip I would suggest is to go for a walk the first week or two. Get your gear on and have a nice slow walk for a mile or 1 1/2 miles. That will get you used to getting out and going on a usual route with your running stuff on. Once you're comfortable in that, take the same route but jog for 50/100 yards or so, nothing major just getting used to the jogging/running sensation. And then the following week jog/run that distance twice. So within a few weeks you won't be running two miles but you will be covering that distance with a mixture of walking and jogging. And then before you know it you'll be jogging the whole thing because you've fed up of walking :d

Go for it Dillinger and keep us informed :)
 

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Dillinger said:
I think Id feel daft of only managing a run around the block, puts me off a bit too in a weird kinda way - I know I have to start somewhere and that would be better than nothing wouldnt it. Im just too impatient for my own good and want to be running miles already!

I dont have anyone to run with either, Ive got details about a group near me but dont know if I want to call them. Id be so nervous about meeting up.

Get me outta my house!
First of all, welcome to RF! :)

As far as only running round the block, its more than a lot of other people ever do.

Also, where do you come from? In Scotland, ther is a group call jogscotland, which caters for beginners who may be more nervous about joining a "proper" club. I've also noticed in Runners World that there a few women's only jogging groups about, there might be one near you.
 

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Discussion Starter #11
Thanks! Believe it or not I actually went out this morning! Only managed to run for maybe half a minute, then walked until I was ok again, then ran, then walked and did that around the block. Felt a bit silly when I realised just how flippin difficult it is.... maybe a bit naive. I blame the runners I see go past me - they make it look so easy! :cool:

Bit conscious of how high my top goes when I run though :embarrassed: I dont suppose you can get knee length tops ;)

Fingers crossed I'll brave it again tomorrow, I almost bottled it when I opened the front door but once I got going it was ok, plus it was quite misty at 6.30am!

Thanks everyone I appreciate it :)
 

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Dillinger said:
Thanks! Believe it or not I actually went out this morning! Only managed to run for maybe half a minute, then walked until I was ok again, then ran, then walked and did that around the block. Felt a bit silly when I realised just how flippin difficult it is.... maybe a bit naive. I blame the runners I see go past me - they make it look so easy! :cool:

Bit conscious of how high my top goes when I run though :embarrassed: I dont suppose you can get knee length tops ;)

Fingers crossed I'll brave it again tomorrow, I almost bottled it when I opened the front door but once I got going it was ok, plus it was quite misty at 6.30am!

Thanks everyone I appreciate it :)

Great!! Well done you! You've taken the hardest step...it will get easier :)
 

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Dillinger said:
Thanks! Believe it or not I actually went out this morning! Only managed to run for maybe half a minute, then walked until I was ok again, then ran, then walked and did that around the block. Felt a bit silly when I realised just how flippin difficult it is.... maybe a bit naive. I blame the runners I see go past me - they make it look so easy! :cool:

Bit conscious of how high my top goes when I run though :embarrassed: I dont suppose you can get knee length tops ;)

Fingers crossed I'll brave it again tomorrow, I almost bottled it when I opened the front door but once I got going it was ok, plus it was quite misty at 6.30am!

Thanks everyone I appreciate it :)

Well done, that's fantastic - just keep going, and imagine how you'll feel when you make it around the block without walking - then twice round the block! It does get easier - and the good thing is, every time you push yourself that little bit further or do that little bit more, you are not only increasing your fitness, but also doing wonders for your mental toughness and self esteem :d Am sure you felt that even today, just for the fact you got out there :cool:
 

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Discussion Starter #14
Sorry to bump thread.....

I completely gave up :( Havent been out again at all, didnt do the R4L. Its so not that I dont want to, its just that I feel that I cant. Most days I cant physically leave my house to take my children for a walk, and the tiredness of having 2 now has really kicked in. I feel like an overweight fool. Ive spoken to my doctor and am waiting if I can have cbt to help with my fear of going out! Its been a few months already and he wasnt hopeful, to say the least.

Im disappointed in myself and embarrassed to be saying this.

Slap me someone!
 

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<slap> There, did that motivate you? Thought not.

Tomorrow is another day. Go for a walk, nothing else. Then come back and tell us how nice the sun/rain was. Once you can do that several times a week we can ask folks for advice about getting you running.

I couldn't run for 1 min when I started. Now I run around 20-30 miles a week, so it is possible.

Keep us up to speed.

Giles
 

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Hi Dillinger,

I didn't used to be able to run for a minute either, and hated stepping out the front door to start with. Some things I like to remember -

A staggering one fifth of people in the UK NEVER walk a distance of 20 minutes in one go. Statistically, this isn't made up of the elderly either, it's almost universal across age groups.

Nearly half of all journeys under two miles are taken by car.

So, even by walking for 20 minutes you are going a darn sight better that a lot of the country. What you're doing is for you, not anyone else, and I promise it does get easier. If anyone is an idiot when you're out and about, remember that in all liklihood you are way above them in respect for yourself. Plus, although I'm a pretty new member on here, it seems everyone is fine with you letting your feelings out on here when you get back, and I for one will certainly support you over the wonder of the intermernet!

If you'd like to look into cbt, one of the teachers I worked with recommended Living Life To The Full - it's a free online course that seemed quite helpful.

Let us know how you get on.

Liz
 

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Hi Dillinger
Everything everyone above has said is so true. Just getting yourself out of the door and going for a walk is way better than doing nothing at all. I have only been jogging since April (had a go once before - got so far and then gave up because so disheartened by my (lack of ) progress). I believe some of us are more 'designed' for running than others - I am definately not! However, this time I am trying really hard to just do what I feel I can on any one day and not beat myself up if I cannot do much. I too get a bit downhearted when I read about all these 'new to running' people who say they only managed 2 miles etc... My longest run in 1.5m and that is after 3 months - and believe me, even that is a real struggle. Just get out there and walk. When you feel like it (and nobody is watching!!) do a few running steps. Very gradually you will find you can do more and your confidence in yourself will soar. You may even find eventually that you are rather good at it - but if not, does it matter? Just do what you can and try not to judge yourself by others ability - if I did that every day I would never get out the door. Best of luck.
 

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My friend was exactly the same as you, she has a 4 year old and a 5 month old. The tiredness of having 2 was horrendous untill baby started sleeping through and she felt like a whale in a blobby suit.
She was becoming very depressed about her entire situation so I dragged her out for a run. We did a round the block stint. We walked for a minute and jogged slowly for 30 seconds. In all honesty we walked and gossiped more than we ran!! Now she puts landmarks in as distances to aim for rather than times.
If you can drag someone out with you it might help or put baby in a carrier and walk (thats blinking hard work too!!). Hope things get better for you.
 

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Hello Dillinger

Hope you are still around the forums.

I was very concious about going out for the first time too and terrified I would meet someone! Now I couldn't give a sh**. I used to avoid rush hour but now always go at that time. Just a few weeks ago I encountered a traffic jam and I was actually running along the pavement slightly faster than the cars. I was terrified incase I tripped and made an ass of myself. Apart from one kid waving at me from the car it felt good.

Believe me it all takes time but stick at it. As others have said go for a walk and progress from there.

Keep us all updated.

Cheers

Gary
 
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